These past couple of weeks have been full of self examination in my relationships with others. As when I always try to look at myself it is painful because coming out of denial is tough!
I really struggle with relationship and closeness with people. There are few people that know the real me, but since I began my Celebrate Recovery journey 3 years ago I have slowly began to try and have connection and closeness with people. I think one of the main things that keeps me from this is the fear of hurting others. With my perfectionism tendencies, it is very hard to connect with people and try to always say and do the right thing but I know it is important to surround myself with people who love me through the good as well as the bad. For me, two of the most painful things in my life are when I hurt those I love and when I am hurt by others. I have ALWAYS struggled with living in "extremes" and I am still learning to trust myself and my ability to make healthy boundaries so that I CAN have healthy relationships in my life instead of trying to get through life without them. So for a long time it felt safe to keep everyone at a distance and do things myself BUT God did not design me that way! He designed me for relationship.
On FACEBOOK I am a "fan" of the Celebrate Recovery page and this week there were 2 very powerful posts that spoke to me. So I thought I would share:
Pain - God's megaphone to get our attention!
"To deny your pain is to refuse God's power to help you recover. How bad does it have to hurt before you are ready to face your denial and admit you can't handle it on your own? Remember, if you could have handled that problem on your own it wouldn't still be a problem." LHC's Choice 2
Why don't you make today the day of surrender? That's right, give up and give it to God. And then make sure you are plugged into His family because none of us are strong enough to do it alone. CR is a great place to make this a reality! Mac
"As strange as it may sound, pain is God's antidote for denial. Pain is God's way of letting us know something is seriously wrong." LHC's Choice #2
God loves us to much to allow anything to destroy our lives or relationships. So He sends pain to let us know there is something that needs our attention. Then when we think, finally, I have worked through all my denial issues, here comes the pain again. God's letting me know I have not arrived and there is something else I need to work on. Are you experiencing some pain in your life? Very possible God is trying to get your attention.